By Susan Simkins

As the daughter of an alcoholic father who was mentally ill, I felt like an inconvenience. When my dad often offered no word or glance to acknowledge my entry into the room, I came to believe my absence was preferable to my presence. 

Without realizing it, I projected my dad’s behavior onto my heavenly Father. I approached God cautiously, bracing for indifference or dismissal. I kept my prayers small, hoping I wouldn’t ask for more than the acceptable limit. I feared being “too much” for God. I believed divine attention had to be earned by doing something exemplary. 

“For the LORD delights in you” (Isaiah 62:4 NKJV).

This verse leaped off the page during my Bible reading. My soul simultaneously stirred with deep yearning and hope long deferred. But doubt soon followed. Really? Me? This verse contradicted my semi-conscious beliefs of an emotionally distant God who tolerated me as an imposition. 

As I immersed myself in the Scriptures, I encountered a God who rescues us, not out of obligation, but instead because he delights in us (Ps. 18:19). His motivation for showing us mercy is not begrudging pity, but delight (Mic. 7:18). He takes immense pleasure in his people (Ps. 149:4) and delights in the little details of their lives (Ps. 37:23 NLT). 

I struggled to grasp the wonder of a heavenly Father who exults over us with singing (Zeph. 3:17 AMPC) and has renamed us his delight (Isa. 62:4). Over months and years, I re-read, meditated upon, and memorized these verses, marveling that they could possibly apply to me.

Yet, Scripture is unequivocal that faith pleases God (Heb. 11:6). We delight the heart of our heavenly Father by trusting his Word. 

When I have fallen prey to the same temptation for the umpteenth time, how do I envision God’s response? A face tight with disgust and turned away in disappointment and cold withdrawal? Or an expression firm with love and soft with compassion that communicates he knows all about my sin and delights in showing me grace? 

Little by little, I am choosing to believe the truth of God’s Word instead of the troubled voices from my dysfunctional upbringing. I am learning to stand in awe before a Father who calls me by name and claims me as his own, even at my worst. 

On a recent trip to visit my two-year-old grandson, Micah’s face lit up when I entered the room, and he jumped up and down with sheer elation. My eyes tear up at the realization that my heavenly Father is redeeming my dad’s dismissal of me through my grandson’s delight upon my arrival. 

Micah’s exuberance is but a small taste of God’s ecstatic welcome when I come into his presence. And delighting in God is loving him back with the faith of a child and Micah-sized joy when he rescues me, shows me mercy, and takes pleasure in me.  

Will you take this moment to delight in God for delighting in you? 

Bio:Dr. Susan Joy Simkins is a professor at Penn State University and the award-winning author of Divine Reversal, her life story of devastation to restoration. She attends Elizabethtown Mennonite Church. Connect with Susan at susanjoysimkins.com.